As I sit here, days away from an epic milestone of being married for 20 years, I have to pinch myself. I am the luckiest girl in the world to be married to Chris Brooker. After being married for 20 years, people ask me all the time how we “make it work” or “what’s your secret” and I usually just give the same response: respect, laughter and a lot prayer.  We love each other very much but as we’ve learned over our 20+ year relationship, love alone isn’t enough.

Chris and Heather Brooker at Rancho Bernardo Inn.

You have to add respect to that. Ultimately, as cheesy as it sounds, Chris is my best friend. He knows how I feel about everything, and then how I REALLY feel about everything. He knows my heart, good and bad and all the mistakes I’ve made, and loves me anyway. And lest you think I’m putting him on a pedestal, he’ll be the first to tell you I also know how he REALLY feels about everything, good and bad. We are symbiotic about our goals, and values.

All of that being said, we don’t agree on everything. We have lively debates, get annoyed with each other, and frustrated just like everyone else. But the one thing that remains, is our respect. You wouldn’t treat your best friend with disrespect so why would you do that with your spouse? We also are humble enough to know when we need to apologize. I have no problem telling Chris I’m sorry if I’ve hurt his feelings and he feels the same way.

Chris and Heather Brooker at Rancho Bernardo Inn.

We are as in love as we were 20 years ago, but it’s a deeper, more mature love. And I can’t wait to honor our commitment to each other on a beach in Maui. We’re planning an intimate vow renewal on the beach and I will probably cry like a baby. But to be fair, so will Chris. Channing is going to be our flower girl and she is so excited!

Make sure you follow along on my Instagram and TikTok to see all of the adventures we have planned. We are staying at the newly renovated Westin Maui Resort and Spa and I can’t wait to show you all around this beautiful property.

We also breakdown the 2021 Oscar nominees and why we think ratings are declining. Tell us if you agree!

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